Personal blog of christian
writer & fallible mom
Katy McKenna Raymond
in Kansas City, Missouri
Katy is represented by
Greg Johnson at
WordServe Literary
Read more Katy at
LateBoomer.net
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Recent Posts
- Try
- Becoming Brenda Starr
- Off Beat
- Scattered
- That’s It
- So I’ve Finally Signed With An Agent. Now What?
- The Spoon
- Sciatica
- Sweetheart
- A Woman’s Train of Thought Has No Caboose
- However much we own, we are all still living on borrowed time
- After all, when restaurants shrink portions, they don’t shrink prices.
- As with everything in life, balance is key.
- Slow down, you move too fast…
- Yeah, I know. I have issues.
Syndicate
E me at katy @ ngenius.com
Self-Talk
I don't think a day in the past eight months has started without me sitting down in front of my computer, staring at the screen, and saying out loud I can't do this.In the past two months, I've added an addendum to my pathetic self-talk, and it is this: But I'm doing it.
I ran across a journal entry of mine from months ago, and thought I'd share it.
"I'm never going to feel competent to write a novel. My feelings of inadequacy are deep enough that I will have to write a book in spite of how I feel, and stop waiting for the day when my feelings change.
It may turn out that I really am inadequate to write a book, that I just don't have what it takes. The only way I'll ever know for sure is to push through the feelings and work my butt off.
Do I want to give up now? Because if I want to, I can. I can walk away and have a pleasant life doing absolutely...nothing.
I feel called to write, but so often I feel incapable of fulfilling the calling. What if I just skipped the whole thing?
How would I explain that to God when it's time to answer for my life?"
The early morning negative self-talk persists. But the novel is almost done.
Posted by Katy on 12/15/03 at 04:40 PM
Fallible Comments...
- Writing a novel, I suppose, iis more of a journey than an endpoint.
And sometimes we don't realize the ground we have covered until we turn around and look behind us.
-----Posted by Maria on 12/16/03 at 09:01 AM - Katy, thank you for sharing that! I recently posted about my fear around moving forward with my novel as well. I had some great feedback from readers. I'd love to point folks to your post, it's so wise! Mind if I link to you?
Posted by Kelly on 12/16/03 at 08:04 PM
- Maria, You are my role-model for ground covering! My soon-to-be-doctor buddy. I sense that I am making inroads, and it's a wonderful feeling. Thanks!
Kelly, I commented on your blog entry about novel writing blocks. This is my third attempt at a novel, the first two ending at 8-12,000 words. ENDING. I hated those characters with a passion by then, and wanted nothing more to do with them. This time it was different! Somewhere along the line (40,000 words?) I decided not to write another word that wasn't part of an actual scene. That has helped me tremendously to move forward. Best wishes!Posted by Katy on 12/16/03 at 08:26 PM - Katy, that's great news -- to hear that the novel's almost done! Wow!
I have a theory that writers are their own harshest critics. Every time I read someone's writing, I think, "But s/he's so much better than I am... if only I could write like that!" And I certainly don't think I could write a novel... *grin*Posted by irene on 12/17/03 at 07:45 PM - Irene, Insecurities abound, huh? When I'm really writing, I don't know if it's better for me to read writers who are fabulous, or not. If they're wonderful, I get frightened. If they're horrible, I get arrogant. I could give up reading, like that's gonna happen. ;)
Posted by Katy on 12/18/03 at 09:42 PM
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