Of Warrants And Warranties

Some days, I just want to add a PayPal button to the sidebar of fallible and take donations. Today, you might have guessed, is one of those days.

My youngest son, whose name I will refrain from mentioning in the same post as words like “Alcohol, Tobacco, and Firearms,” lest he be apprehended for yet another low crime or misdemeanor, is racking up some large debts on his little trip home from Switzerland.

Unfortunately for us, we had to front the money to post bond for the kid, as his life on the lam (and on the Continent) has left him penniless. Sure, it was only $250, but still, it stung.

The screen on the boy’s Canon digital camera, exactly 1.1 years old (isn’t everything?), failed yesterday. I spent an hour hunting down the paperwork on the purchase and finally found it. Yeah, I’d purchased what I thought was an extended warranty on the thing, for $78. It wasn’t extended, it was “essential.” Or some word like that. Meaning it would cover all the dumb stuff a kid might do, like run over his camera with his car or fling it off a Swiss mountain or slide it off his plate with the unwanted cauliflower into the garbage disposal. However, the term of the warranty only covered the first year of possession. My mistake.

It took umpteen phone calls to Wolf Camera, until we’d almost reached the level of corporate headquarters, before we were told we’d be allowed to purchase, for another $78, a warranty to cover this year’s defects. The screen would have cost $150 to repair, so they met us halfway.

Our youngster headed down the road to the camera store, and then planned to visit his brother and sister-in-law at their home. When he didn’t arrive back at our house within the time I expected, I called his cell. Actually, his cell which now contains the battery from my cell because his battery has failed. I have no cell. But that’s OK, because when he goes back to Switzerland on Feb. 2, my lack of cell phone will match my lack of camera. (We’ll give him ours to take and then hang on to his when we get it back from its 4-week repair job.)

I probably should go ahead and mention that since he’s been home he’s also had to replace a failed harddrive on his iBook. He purchased the computer in August and by December, it was kaput. This has NOTHING to do with my story, except to illustrate that so far, his time home has been about product failures and attempting to make them right.

Until last night. Yeah, last night he really switched it up.

When he didn’t answer his cell containing my battery, I didn’t think too much of it. Oh, sure, the usual imaginings involving ditches and rollovers, but I’m used to those pictures passing through my paranoid mind. They started when the first kid got a learner’s permit and ended, well…never.

He finally called, and it was a good thing his dad answered. Those unlimited minutes we love to crow about? Don’t matter a bit when they only give you “one call.”

He’d been stopped for expired plates. Of course, I renewed his stickers while he was in Switzerland. The metal plates were so filthy that day that rather than clean them before applying the new stickers, I put the stickers in his glove box and forgot all about it. With the stickers, attached by a paper clip, is his current proof of insurance, which he also managed not to find when he got pulled over.

When the cops looked up his info, they informed him there was a warrant out for his arrest. A pat-down occurred. Handcuffs were produced and attached. I can only assume a policeman protected the top of my son’s head while lowering him into the squad car. I do know that Miranda and her rights did not arrive on the scene at any time.

He was hauled to the most local jail and put in a cell. From there, he was extradited to the larger county jail, handcuffed during the 30 minute ride through residential areas filled with good children on bikes wearing knee pads and safety helmets, who pointed to the car window and said, “Who is that bad man, Mommy? And why is he sticking out his tongue at me?” And all the mothers for miles around soothed their offspring by answering, “Don’t worry, little Miles or Madison or Lily or Lucy! That man will never be able to hurt anyone ever again!”

Mug shots were snapped, which I have not seen, but which I figure look just like his passport. Dear Lord, his eyes are gorgeous.

His crime? Last August, perhaps the same day he purchased his iBook and therefore found himself in some altered state of Apple-induced euphoria, he sold a pack of ciggies to a minor at the hotel where he worked behind the front desk.

I don’t know if you realize this, but figuring out someone’s age isn’t always easy. The girl in question (pressed into service by the ATF for their sting operation) presented her genuine drivers license, and she was genuinely underage. Something about negotiating that tricky turn of the century, though, makes it complicated to quickly do the math in situations like these. Most hotels have a little calendar on the wall, showing an historical date of precisely 18 years ago. The clerk glances at the calendar and at the ID presented and knows that if the person was born on or before the date on the calendar, they’re legit.

What can I say? My kid’s employer didn’t have this helpful prop, and the New Apple Smell that night must have gotten to him.

Anyway, he’s sitting here beside me right now, playing guitar. He looks so innocent, so unlike what you’d expect of a common misdemeanoron. Too bad we can’t say that to the judge, huh? Next Wednesday, just 48 hours before he’s set to leave the country, he’ll have his day in court. With us, of course, the wielders of the mighty debit card. Who knows how much we’ll fork over before the next time he’s leaving on a jet plane?

One thing’s fairly certain: the warranty on my sense of humor expired a while back. If I do install a PayPal button on fallible, I promise any contributions beyond those needed to keep my kid on the right side of the law will be used to purchase me a new funny bone.

If you’re lucky, I won’t misplace it in the glove box.

Posted by Katy on 01/25/07 at 09:53 AM

Fallible Comments...

Ohhh, so sorry for your troubles. Sheesh. I'll pray
Posted by Suzan on 01/25/07 at 12:53 PM
I've bailed a kid out for unpaid parking tickets; they were stopped for the expired tags. Just monkey barrels of fun...
Hope it doesn't set you back too much. Maybe try to think of it as another type of educational expense. Life lessons, or something...
Posted by Anne on 01/25/07 at 03:04 PM
Suzan--You are so nice. Darned if the kid doesn't make good blog fodder, huh?

Anne--Educational expense, eh? The kid nearly got through without any student loans, but as of last night, he's got one! And as of Wednesday when he goes to court, he'll have a bigger one. He already knows that even if he has a job lined up to start the minute he graduates, he WILL live with us until we're paid off. Great incentive for him to make it happen!

I am glad he got pulled over, though. The warrant was just issued on the 18th. What if when he tried to leave the country in 8 days, they discovered a warrant we didn't even know about? Do they check stuff like this when you're exiting the US? I have no idea.
Posted by Katy on 01/25/07 at 03:22 PM
Katy,
I'm sure I've already told you this, seeing as how we kind of give each other our whole life's stories when we see each other, but I too have been arrested. And I assure you that they did protect the top of my head. Maybe, just maybe this little confession will at least make you smile and help along that funny bone.
Posted by Galadriel on 01/25/07 at 04:03 PM
My biggest motivation for staying out of trouble is that I never want to be put on the "no fly" list. I wish it was for something noble, like conscience or God.
Posted by alison on 01/25/07 at 04:53 PM
Galadriel--Oh, you cute thing. The top of your head, I must say, is as darling as the rest of you, a credit to the law enforcement community!! :)

Alison--Now you're scaring me! Do you think a warrant issued as recently as Jan. 18 for something like selling ciggies to a minor could put someone on a no-fly list by Feb 2? Or would it take a felony charge of some type??? Yikes!!
Posted by Katy on 01/25/07 at 05:03 PM
He's home, he's safe. Priceless.

Random facts:

Today the 20 year old we allow to live in our house, who spent much of her life on the streets, in foster homes, and worse, started "workin' me" about an "old friend" she met in "lockdown" years ago. She hasn't seen her in years, but found her on "MySpace" (love that place, really) She's 17 or 18, pregnant, in El Paso, selling herself and living on the couch circuit when she can. I imagine drugs are involved too, but we haven't gotten to those little details.

We're going slow trying to find a way to help her.

Fact 2: I have been in more jails than I remember - literally - one in Mexico. I had no parents to bail me out.
Those stories are only now dredged up for when the occasional "Scared Straight" video crew drops by...or I teach a Sunday school lesson.

Fact 3: Harrowing as it all is, you've got a son whose "first call" was to you.

A lot of parents and a lot of kids would praise God for that one call...knowing they could make it/receive it and the person on the other end wouldn't hang up.

Don't be too quick to overlook blessings....sometimes like angels, they come in unexpected forms I think.

Grace & Peace,

Michael
Posted by Michael Main on 01/25/07 at 05:10 PM
Ouch!
Posted by Chris(tine) on 01/25/07 at 06:52 PM
Michael--I appreciate your perspective, not only as a parent but as one who has reached out and helped down and out kids and truly given of yourself. Thank you! That's the thing about this son: He TRULY has brought us nothing but joy his whole life. He's gotten in a few scrapes like this, but they were completely unintentional, shocking him almost as much as us!! I'm not saying he's perfect, but he's darned close. :) I don't think we expressed a cross word to him over what happened last night. On the night he mistakenly sold the ciggies, he came right home and told us. He was so mad at himself for messing up that we had to calm him down and assure him it wasn't the end of the world.

Whatever the outcome of the day in court, we will accept as part of God's good purpose for Kevin and us. Even if he's prevented from returning to Switzerland to complete his degree, it'll be OK. I think. All right, I'll have to work on that one a bit more!!

Chris(tine)--Ah, life with boys! And, according to my young friend Galadriel who posted above, girls, too. I'd rather have one day with this kid than a whole lifetime without him. He's a doll. An expensive doll, but a doll. :)
Posted by Katy on 01/25/07 at 07:56 PM
Hi Katy, Pay no attention to me. I'm the "glass is half empty/glass is half empty" person. Talk to a lawyer (you probably already have), go to court, and pay any amount of money to put this behind you and "the kid." In the greater scheme of things, this is really, really minor. I'm sorry I made you worry.
Posted by alison on 01/26/07 at 12:03 PM
Ah Katy - what a week you've had! I feel certain this will all blow over with no major issues. Your son will be back in Switzerland before you know it and this will be nothing more than great blogging fodder! BTW - you're handling it with lots of grace and diplomacy and a big 'ol funny bone!
Posted by Staci on 01/26/07 at 02:54 PM
I'm not going to get a dollar for every comment on this one, am I.
Posted by kevin on 01/27/07 at 01:34 PM
Alison--Yeah, really. I might as well buy those 4-oz glasses! ;) We've talked to the County DA. He believes that when we go to court on Wednesday, they will likely defer my son's probabtion to begin when he gets home from Switz in June. Then they'll make him take a class. In what, I can't imagine. He's graduating with a Business degree, with a ton of hospitality management courses. Which is to say, he may sell ciggies to minors, but he does it VERY politely and with a smile! This IS minor, and I know it. This kid is as good as gold.

Staci--My son approved my blog post, as I always ask the kids and hubby to do before I publish. I wouldn't want to embarass them, OK I would, and sometimes pay them $$$$ for the privilege. But this one didn't even ask for $$ this time!!

Young son whose name I have refrained from mentioning during the entire course of this discussion--No $$$$ shower for you! Better luck next time! :)
Posted by Katy on 01/27/07 at 02:02 PM
Just a comment on your kids approving your blog - I have to have my kids AND my mother approve my Christmas letter before it goes out. Also, my dad was a country preacher and my mom made him promise to never use us kids as illustrations in his messages, and he never did. I think $1 a comment is fair. Since I made 3 comments, do you think he's take $2.50?
Posted by alison on 01/29/07 at 06:24 PM
Katy,
Was Kev seriously NOT read his rights? You do know that they can't do that, right? You could have totally gotten the cops on that one and Kev could have gotten off. Let me know.
Posted by Bridget on 02/05/07 at 01:16 PM

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Personal blog of christian writer & fallible mom Katy McKenna Raymond in Kansas City, Missouri Katy is represented by Greg Johnson at WordServe Literary Read more Katy at LateBoomer.net Follow Katy on Twitter Follow Katy on Facebook 123 Recent Posts Try Becoming Brenda Starr Off Beat Scattered That’s It So I’ve Finally Signed With An Agent. Now What? The Spoon Sciatica Sweetheart A Woman’s Train of Thought Has No Caboose However much we own, we are all still living on borrowed time After all, when restaurants shrink portions, they don’t shrink prices. As with everything in life, balance is key. Slow down, you move too fast… Yeah, I know. I have issues. Search Advanced Search Syndicate Login E me at katy @ ngenius.com	Of Warrants And Warranties Some days, I just want to add a PayPal button to the sidebar of fallible and take donations. Today, you might have guessed, is one of those days. My youngest son, whose name I will refrain from mentioning in the same post as words like “Alcohol, Tobacco, and Firearms,” lest he be apprehended for yet another low crime or misdemeanor, is racking up some large debts on his little trip home from Switzerland. Unfortunately for us, we had to front the money to post bond for the kid, as his life on the lam (and on the Continent) has left him penniless. Sure, it was only $250, but still, it stung. The screen on the boy’s Canon digital camera, exactly 1.1 years old (isn’t everything?), failed yesterday. I spent an hour hunting down the paperwork on the purchase and finally found it. Yeah, I’d purchased what I thought was an extended warranty on the thing, for $78. It wasn’t extended, it was “essential.” Or some word like that. Meaning it would cover all the dumb stuff a kid might do, like run over his camera with his car or fling it off a Swiss mountain or slide it off his plate with the unwanted cauliflower into the garbage disposal. However, the term of the warranty only covered the first year of possession. My mistake. It took umpteen phone calls to Wolf Camera, until we’d almost reached the level of corporate headquarters, before we were told we’d be allowed to purchase, for another $78, a warranty to cover this year’s defects. The screen would have cost $150 to repair, so they met us halfway. Our youngster headed down the road to the camera store, and then planned to visit his brother and sister-in-law at their home. When he didn’t arrive back at our house within the time I expected, I called his cell. Actually, his cell which now contains the battery from my cell because his battery has failed. I have no cell. But that’s OK, because when he goes back to Switzerland on Feb. 2, my lack of cell phone will match my lack of camera. (We’ll give him ours to take and then hang on to his when we get it back from its 4-week repair job.) I probably should go ahead and mention that since he’s been home he’s also had to replace a failed harddrive on his iBook. He purchased the computer in August and by December, it was kaput. This has NOTHING to do with my story, except to illustrate that so far, his time home has been about product failures and attempting to make them right. Until last night. Yeah, last night he really switched it up. When he didn’t answer his cell containing my battery, I didn’t think too much of it. Oh, sure, the usual imaginings involving ditches and rollovers, but I’m used to those pictures passing through my paranoid mind. They started when the first kid got a learner’s permit and ended, well…never. He finally called, and it was a good thing his dad answered. Those unlimited minutes we love to crow about? Don’t matter a bit when they only give you “one call.” He’d been stopped for expired plates. Of course, I renewed his stickers while he was in Switzerland. The metal plates were so filthy that day that rather than clean them before applying the new stickers, I put the stickers in his glove box and forgot all about it. With the stickers, attached by a paper clip, is his current proof of insurance, which he also managed not to find when he got pulled over. When the cops looked up his info, they informed him there was a warrant out for his arrest. A pat-down occurred. Handcuffs were produced and attached. I can only assume a policeman protected the top of my son’s head while lowering him into the squad car. I do know that Miranda and her rights did not arrive on the scene at any time. He was hauled to the most local jail and put in a cell. From there, he was extradited to the larger county jail, handcuffed during the 30 minute ride through residential areas filled with good children on bikes wearing knee pads and safety helmets, who pointed to the car window and said, “Who is that bad man, Mommy? And why is he sticking out his tongue at me?” And all the mothers for miles around soothed their offspring by answering, “Don’t worry, little Miles or Madison or Lily or Lucy! That man will never be able to hurt anyone ever again!” Mug shots were snapped, which I have not seen, but which I figure look just like his passport. Dear Lord, his eyes are gorgeous. His crime? Last August, perhaps the same day he purchased his iBook and therefore found himself in some altered state of Apple-induced euphoria, he sold a pack of ciggies to a minor at the hotel where he worked behind the front desk. I don’t know if you realize this, but figuring out someone’s age isn’t always easy. The girl in question (pressed into service by the ATF for their sting operation) presented her genuine drivers license, and she was genuinely underage. Something about negotiating that tricky turn of the century, though, makes it complicated to quickly do the math in situations like these. Most hotels have a little calendar on the wall, showing an historical date of precisely 18 years ago. The clerk glances at the calendar and at the ID presented and knows that if the person was born on or before the date on the calendar, they’re legit. What can I say? My kid’s employer didn’t have this helpful prop, and the New Apple Smell that night must have gotten to him. Anyway, he’s sitting here beside me right now, playing guitar. He looks so innocent, so unlike what you’d expect of a common misdemeanoron. Too bad we can’t say that to the judge, huh? Next Wednesday, just 48 hours before he’s set to leave the country, he’ll have his day in court. With us, of course, the wielders of the mighty debit card. Who knows how much we’ll fork over before the next time he’s leaving on a jet plane? One thing’s fairly certain: the warranty on my sense of humor expired a while back. If I do install a PayPal button on fallible, I promise any contributions beyond those needed to keep my kid on the right side of the law will be used to purchase me a new funny bone. If you’re lucky, I won’t misplace it in the glove box. Posted by Katy on 01/25/07 at 09:53 AM Fallible Comments... Ohhh, so sorry for your troubles. Sheesh. I'll pray Posted by Suzan on 01/25/07 at 12:53 PM I've bailed a kid out for unpaid parking tickets; they were stopped for the expired tags. Just monkey barrels of fun... Hope it doesn't set you back too much. Maybe try to think of it as another type of educational expense. Life lessons, or something... Posted by Anne on 01/25/07 at 03:04 PM Suzan--You are so nice. Darned if the kid doesn't make good blog fodder, huh? Anne--Educational expense, eh? The kid nearly got through without any student loans, but as of last night, he's got one! And as of Wednesday when he goes to court, he'll have a bigger one. He already knows that even if he has a job lined up to start the minute he graduates, he WILL live with us until we're paid off. Great incentive for him to make it happen! I am glad he got pulled over, though. The warrant was just issued on the 18th. What if when he tried to leave the country in 8 days, they discovered a warrant we didn't even know about? Do they check stuff like this when you're exiting the US? I have no idea. Posted by Katy on 01/25/07 at 03:22 PM Katy, I'm sure I've already told you this, seeing as how we kind of give each other our whole life's stories when we see each other, but I too have been arrested. And I assure you that they did protect the top of my head. Maybe, just maybe this little confession will at least make you smile and help along that funny bone. Posted by Galadriel on 01/25/07 at 04:03 PM My biggest motivation for staying out of trouble is that I never want to be put on the "no fly" list. I wish it was for something noble, like conscience or God. Posted by alison on 01/25/07 at 04:53 PM Galadriel--Oh, you cute thing. The top of your head, I must say, is as darling as the rest of you, a credit to the law enforcement community!! :) Alison--Now you're scaring me! Do you think a warrant issued as recently as Jan. 18 for something like selling ciggies to a minor could put someone on a no-fly list by Feb 2? Or would it take a felony charge of some type??? Yikes!! Posted by Katy on 01/25/07 at 05:03 PM He's home, he's safe. Priceless. Random facts: Today the 20 year old we allow to live in our house, who spent much of her life on the streets, in foster homes, and worse, started "workin' me" about an "old friend" she met in "lockdown" years ago. She hasn't seen her in years, but found her on "MySpace" (love that place, really) She's 17 or 18, pregnant, in El Paso, selling herself and living on the couch circuit when she can. I imagine drugs are involved too, but we haven't gotten to those little details. We're going slow trying to find a way to help her. Fact 2: I have been in more jails than I remember - literally - one in Mexico. I had no parents to bail me out. Those stories are only now dredged up for when the occasional "Scared Straight" video crew drops by...or I teach a Sunday school lesson. Fact 3: Harrowing as it all is, you've got a son whose "first call" was to you. A lot of parents and a lot of kids would praise God for that one call...knowing they could make it/receive it and the person on the other end wouldn't hang up. Don't be too quick to overlook blessings....sometimes like angels, they come in unexpected forms I think. Grace & Peace, Michael Posted by Michael Main on 01/25/07 at 05:10 PM Ouch! Posted by Chris(tine) on 01/25/07 at 06:52 PM Michael--I appreciate your perspective, not only as a parent but as one who has reached out and helped down and out kids and truly given of yourself. Thank you! That's the thing about this son: He TRULY has brought us nothing but joy his whole life. He's gotten in a few scrapes like this, but they were completely unintentional, shocking him almost as much as us!! I'm not saying he's perfect, but he's darned close. :) I don't think we expressed a cross word to him over what happened last night. On the night he mistakenly sold the ciggies, he came right home and told us. He was so mad at himself for messing up that we had to calm him down and assure him it wasn't the end of the world. Whatever the outcome of the day in court, we will accept as part of God's good purpose for Kevin and us. Even if he's prevented from returning to Switzerland to complete his degree, it'll be OK. I think. All right, I'll have to work on that one a bit more!! Chris(tine)--Ah, life with boys! And, according to my young friend Galadriel who posted above, girls, too. I'd rather have one day with this kid than a whole lifetime without him. He's a doll. An expensive doll, but a doll. :) Posted by Katy on 01/25/07 at 07:56 PM Hi Katy, Pay no attention to me. I'm the "glass is half empty/glass is half empty" person. Talk to a lawyer (you probably already have), go to court, and pay any amount of money to put this behind you and "the kid." In the greater scheme of things, this is really, really minor. I'm sorry I made you worry. Posted by alison on 01/26/07 at 12:03 PM Ah Katy - what a week you've had! I feel certain this will all blow over with no major issues. Your son will be back in Switzerland before you know it and this will be nothing more than great blogging fodder! BTW - you're handling it with lots of grace and diplomacy and a big 'ol funny bone! Posted by Staci on 01/26/07 at 02:54 PM I'm not going to get a dollar for every comment on this one, am I. Posted by kevin on 01/27/07 at 01:34 PM Alison--Yeah, really. I might as well buy those 4-oz glasses! ;) We've talked to the County DA. He believes that when we go to court on Wednesday, they will likely defer my son's probabtion to begin when he gets home from Switz in June. Then they'll make him take a class. In what, I can't imagine. He's graduating with a Business degree, with a ton of hospitality management courses. Which is to say, he may sell ciggies to minors, but he does it VERY politely and with a smile! This IS minor, and I know it. This kid is as good as gold. Staci--My son approved my blog post, as I always ask the kids and hubby to do before I publish. I wouldn't want to embarass them, OK I would, and sometimes pay them $$$$ for the privilege. But this one didn't even ask for $$ this time!! Young son whose name I have refrained from mentioning during the entire course of this discussion--No $$$$ shower for you! Better luck next time! :) Posted by Katy on 01/27/07 at 02:02 PM Just a comment on your kids approving your blog - I have to have my kids AND my mother approve my Christmas letter before it goes out. Also, my dad was a country preacher and my mom made him promise to never use us kids as illustrations in his messages, and he never did. I think $1 a comment is fair. Since I made 3 comments, do you think he's take $2.50? Posted by alison on 01/29/07 at 06:24 PM Katy, Was Kev seriously NOT read his rights? You do know that they can't do that, right? You could have totally gotten the cops on that one and Kev could have gotten off. Let me know. Posted by Bridget on 02/05/07 at 01:16 PM Page 1 of 1 pages Commenting is not available in this weblog entry. Next entry: Wipe Out Previous entry: Statistics Schmatistics << Back to main


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Of Warrants And Warranties

Personal blog of christian
writer & fallible mom
Katy McKenna Raymond
in Kansas City, Missouri