Making A Case For Victoria’s Secret

If ever there was a time to upgrade your underwear--especially if you live in Kansas City--this is it.

A Capitol Federal bank in a nice area of Olathe, Kansas (a suburb of KC, where we used to live before moving back to the Missouri side of the state line) was held up this morning. The robber made the employees (and customers, too, if the news accounts prove accurate) strip down to their undies and then took one of the nearly naked employees hostage in his getaway van.

Shots were fired in the parking lot of the bank and again at the small airport a couple of miles away, where apparently the robber intended to hitch a ride to who-knows-where. The suspect was shot and critically wounded, but may recover from his injuries to face charges.

At least he didn't suffer the indignity of arriving at Overland Park Regional Hospital with his crummy underwear on display in front of God and everybody.

If I'd been an employee or customer of the bank, I might have volunteered to be taken hostage in exchange for being allowed to remain fully clothed.

But just so I'll never have to face a situation-ethics dilemma of that magnitude, I'm heading over to Victoria's Secret before it's too late.

Posted by Katy on 05/18/05 at 06:11 PM

Fallible Comments...

New, clean, even stylish underwear, yes. But I'm not sure VS is your vendor of choice. Do you really want to be on national news in a leopard-print miracle bra and lacy thong? While you're at it, grab a pair of those white wings they put on their models for photo shoots. When the robber pulls out his gun, put the wings on. He may think your an angel and repent right there. Or he'd think you're crazy and choose a different hostage. Either way, you win.
-----
Posted by Jeanne Damoff on 05/19/05 at 12:47 AM
Jeanne--Yeah, I overshot with the VS idea. The idea would not be to ATTRACT attention should I find myself sans outerwear, but to minimize attention. Stylish and fairly new would fill the bill. Speaking of thongs, was it VS that recently carried one that was composed in the back entirely of a string of PEARLS??? YIKES!!! Maybe I'll stick with Kohl's. :)
Posted by Katy on 05/19/05 at 01:29 AM
Hmmm...Doug CLEARLY remembers that we were together on a stroll through VS when we saw the horrible string-o'-pearls thong on display. We must have stood there with our mouths hanging open for a couple minutes, until finally a sales clerk approached us, waited a beat too long, and then asked, "Do you have any questions?" Oh, yeah. We have a TON of questions, baby! But none that we felt comfortable asking an 18-year-old!!! :)
Doug, by the way, has an excellent memory, don't you think??
Posted by Katy on 05/19/05 at 01:43 AM
Katy, did you notice that the employees who were rather on the hefty side were left fully clothed in the bank and weren't taken hostage in the van? I thought that was hilarious! He picked the cute, skinny chicks to strip and take with him! Only a guy would think of that...
Posted by Bridget on 05/19/05 at 02:47 AM
I need to turn on the news to get the update! That's hilarious--at least, I think it is...Maybe it's not such a bad idea to keep a few extra pounds on the old bod for "protection." Sheesh.

Did the guy actually take any money? Or just cute skinny naked chicks? Talk about illusions of grandeur!
Posted by Katy on 05/19/05 at 02:55 AM
Pearls for the back of a thong? Ouch. Somehow I'm thinkin' VS undies are _not_ designed by women for women.

Yes, I agree Doug's memory is quite impressive. ;)
Posted by Jeanne Damoff on 05/19/05 at 06:44 AM
Remember the old Jack Benny joke where a robber says, "Your money or your life"? There's a pause, the robber says, "Come on" and Benny says, "I'm thinking. I'm thinking." That would be my reaction if somebody stuck a gun in my face and told me to disrobe in public.
Posted by Angus Lewis on 05/19/05 at 07:31 PM
more underwear posting...you take the cake, katy ;). (and I would have to agree with Angus..if faced with choosing between my modesty and my life...i think.)
Posted by lisa on 05/19/05 at 09:10 PM
I so agree! I may joke about these things, but honestly, I really think that if I'd been one of the cute young skinny tellers, I would have just said no. And if I'd been one of the chubby ones who weren't asked to disrobe, I'd have been just a little insulted!!

I still haven't heard whether he pulled a gun on them when he made his demands. My first inclination was to think he'd made everyone take their clothes off, so that they wouldn't follow him when he fled the building, but that wasn't his motivation! Evidently, he just wanted to see some cute chicks in their undies and that's just pathetic. What self-respecting bank robber would act like that?
Posted by Katy on 05/19/05 at 09:16 PM
Also, I noticed on the late news last night that the reporters stopped mentioning the part about the shed clothing. I've got to think the employees are SO embarassed that they actually obeyed the guy and removed their clothing. Plus, how the heck could you go back to work at the bank this morning, after everyone's seen it all?

I think I'm WAY too modest to be a bank teller!
Posted by Katy on 05/19/05 at 09:21 PM
That's just it, Katy! The chunky employees are heading back to work. The others no longer have issues with modesty or disrobing in public, and can now be seen dancing at oou local Million Dollar Fantasy Ranch!
Posted by Bridget on 05/19/05 at 11:15 PM

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Personal blog of christian writer & fallible mom Katy McKenna Raymond in Kansas City, Missouri Katy is represented by Greg Johnson at WordServe Literary Read more Katy at LateBoomer.net Follow Katy on Twitter Follow Katy on Facebook 123 Recent Posts Try Becoming Brenda Starr Off Beat Scattered That’s It So I’ve Finally Signed With An Agent. Now What? The Spoon Sciatica Sweetheart A Woman’s Train of Thought Has No Caboose However much we own, we are all still living on borrowed time After all, when restaurants shrink portions, they don’t shrink prices. As with everything in life, balance is key. Slow down, you move too fast… Yeah, I know. I have issues. Search Advanced Search Syndicate Login E me at katy @ ngenius.com	Making A Case For Victoria’s Secret If ever there was a time to upgrade your underwear--especially if you live in Kansas City--this is it. A Capitol Federal bank in a nice area of Olathe, Kansas (a suburb of KC, where we used to live before moving back to the Missouri side of the state line) was held up this morning. The robber made the employees (and customers, too, if the news accounts prove accurate) strip down to their undies and then took one of the nearly naked employees hostage in his getaway van. Shots were fired in the parking lot of the bank and again at the small airport a couple of miles away, where apparently the robber intended to hitch a ride to who-knows-where. The suspect was shot and critically wounded, but may recover from his injuries to face charges. At least he didn't suffer the indignity of arriving at Overland Park Regional Hospital with his crummy underwear on display in front of God and everybody. If I'd been an employee or customer of the bank, I might have volunteered to be taken hostage in exchange for being allowed to remain fully clothed. But just so I'll never have to face a situation-ethics dilemma of that magnitude, I'm heading over to Victoria's Secret before it's too late. Posted by Katy on 05/18/05 at 06:11 PM Fallible Comments... New, clean, even stylish underwear, yes. But I'm not sure VS is your vendor of choice. Do you really want to be on national news in a leopard-print miracle bra and lacy thong? While you're at it, grab a pair of those white wings they put on their models for photo shoots. When the robber pulls out his gun, put the wings on. He may think your an angel and repent right there. Or he'd think you're crazy and choose a different hostage. Either way, you win. ----- Posted by Jeanne Damoff on 05/19/05 at 12:47 AM Jeanne--Yeah, I overshot with the VS idea. The idea would not be to ATTRACT attention should I find myself sans outerwear, but to minimize attention. Stylish and fairly new would fill the bill. Speaking of thongs, was it VS that recently carried one that was composed in the back entirely of a string of PEARLS??? YIKES!!! Maybe I'll stick with Kohl's. :) Posted by Katy on 05/19/05 at 01:29 AM Hmmm...Doug CLEARLY remembers that we were together on a stroll through VS when we saw the horrible string-o'-pearls thong on display. We must have stood there with our mouths hanging open for a couple minutes, until finally a sales clerk approached us, waited a beat too long, and then asked, "Do you have any questions?" Oh, yeah. We have a TON of questions, baby! But none that we felt comfortable asking an 18-year-old!!! :) Doug, by the way, has an excellent memory, don't you think?? Posted by Katy on 05/19/05 at 01:43 AM Katy, did you notice that the employees who were rather on the hefty side were left fully clothed in the bank and weren't taken hostage in the van? I thought that was hilarious! He picked the cute, skinny chicks to strip and take with him! Only a guy would think of that... Posted by Bridget on 05/19/05 at 02:47 AM I need to turn on the news to get the update! That's hilarious--at least, I think it is...Maybe it's not such a bad idea to keep a few extra pounds on the old bod for "protection." Sheesh. Did the guy actually take any money? Or just cute skinny naked chicks? Talk about illusions of grandeur! Posted by Katy on 05/19/05 at 02:55 AM Pearls for the back of a thong? Ouch. Somehow I'm thinkin' VS undies are _not_ designed by women for women. Yes, I agree Doug's memory is quite impressive. ;) Posted by Jeanne Damoff on 05/19/05 at 06:44 AM Remember the old Jack Benny joke where a robber says, "Your money or your life"? There's a pause, the robber says, "Come on" and Benny says, "I'm thinking. I'm thinking." That would be my reaction if somebody stuck a gun in my face and told me to disrobe in public. Posted by Angus Lewis on 05/19/05 at 07:31 PM more underwear posting...you take the cake, katy ;). (and I would have to agree with Angus..if faced with choosing between my modesty and my life...i think.) Posted by lisa on 05/19/05 at 09:10 PM I so agree! I may joke about these things, but honestly, I really think that if I'd been one of the cute young skinny tellers, I would have just said no. And if I'd been one of the chubby ones who weren't asked to disrobe, I'd have been just a little insulted!! I still haven't heard whether he pulled a gun on them when he made his demands. My first inclination was to think he'd made everyone take their clothes off, so that they wouldn't follow him when he fled the building, but that wasn't his motivation! Evidently, he just wanted to see some cute chicks in their undies and that's just pathetic. What self-respecting bank robber would act like that? Posted by Katy on 05/19/05 at 09:16 PM Also, I noticed on the late news last night that the reporters stopped mentioning the part about the shed clothing. I've got to think the employees are SO embarassed that they actually obeyed the guy and removed their clothing. Plus, how the heck could you go back to work at the bank this morning, after everyone's seen it all? I think I'm WAY too modest to be a bank teller! Posted by Katy on 05/19/05 at 09:21 PM That's just it, Katy! The chunky employees are heading back to work. The others no longer have issues with modesty or disrobing in public, and can now be seen dancing at oou local Million Dollar Fantasy Ranch! Posted by Bridget on 05/19/05 at 11:15 PM Page 1 of 1 pages Commenting is not available in this weblog entry. Next entry: Every Bit As Entertaining As American Idol Previous entry: I'd Darned Well Better Adjust, And Fast << Back to main


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Making A Case For Victoria’s Secret

Personal blog of christian
writer & fallible mom
Katy McKenna Raymond
in Kansas City, Missouri