It’s Downright Ear-y, Don’t You Think?

Usually, when I come down with one of those rare disorders/diseases that no one's ever heard of because only one out of 100,000 people in the general population contract it, I end up feeling pretty lonely.

That's the way it was with my brain tumor. Until you heard about me, chances are you'd never known anyone who'd had an acoustic neuroma, which is the name for a benign tumor on the eighth cranial nerve--the one that controls hearing and balance.

Evidently, my exclusive little club has a growing membership which consists of cell phone users who've been holding their phones to their ears for at least ten years. The incidence of acoustic neuroma is four times higher among long-term cell phone users, and the tumors invariably appear on the side of their heads where the phones have been.

I still feel a little left out, though. Not only was my tumor removed five years ago, before we'd had a cell phone for ten whole years, but my tumor was on the right side of my head. I'm definitely left-eared and always have been--but even moreso now that my right ear is deaf.

If only, if only, I'd been able to hold off a few more years. Maybe I could have held the cell up to my right ear a couple of times before calling this man.

Sigh. As usual, timing is everything.

Posted by Katy on 01/12/05 at 03:17 AM

Fallible Comments...

Aw, shucks! Where's the justice?!
-----
Posted by timsamoff on 01/12/05 at 11:45 PM
Seriously. How would you feel if your very unique health problem suddenly became so commonplace that everyone and their brother could sue for gazillions of bucks? And due to some bizarre fluke of nature or technology, you couldn't be grandfathered in to the goodies? It's a travesty, I tell you... :)
Posted by Katy Raymond on 01/13/05 at 12:52 AM
LOL you are so funny. And what more funny is I'm laughing about a tumor related post. It sheds a whole new light on that old saying, "Oh, yeah, that was about as funny as a tumor."

And that wonderful attorney who wants to help people.... I liked this line from the study:

"The risk of developing a tumor [from cell phone usage] was double for those who started using a cell phone before their diagnosis."

So, um.... does that mean if I get a tumor now, I can still run out and buy a cell phone and have a fifty percent chance of getting money by suing the cell phone company? Well if that's the case Katy, I'd say that developing the tumor in less than ten years and on the wrong side still gives you a great case.

Seriously, though, what an ordeal. And it's likely that the cell phone does play a part in all of this. I'm glad I don't have one. (Wonder what my microwave is doing to my kids?) I can't wait for heaven when we can have all the fun without paying any of the price. I think we will ride on lions and be able to move through time and space in the blink of an eye. I think we'll be able to fly. Who knows? But it will be so far better than what we have now that all our techno-gadgets will look like silly toys and all that we can buy with money we win in lawsuits will look like dung. And in heaven there will be no illnesses, no pain, no fear, no loss. No sin to mar our relationship with Christ--we will feel his good will toward us every moment instead of slogging through life by faith. Wow. I can't wait.

sally
Posted by sally apokedak on 01/13/05 at 02:03 AM
You know - a day late and a dollar short. You are so right - it's all in the timing.
Posted by Tina on 01/13/05 at 02:27 AM
And here I thought I was the only person in the world who considered himself "left-eared." I haven't confessed this anywhere until now because, quite frankly, my keepers only need one really good excuse to throw away the key and this is just odd enough to do the trick.

Katy, is it possible you are also, like myself, left-footed (for punting or playing kick ball) and left handed?
Posted by Michael on 01/13/05 at 08:08 AM
Count me in as "left-eared" also. I guess I've always assumed that went with being left-handed. And hopelessly out-of-step and with every choreographed dance which invariably begins with the right foot. That's my excuse anyway...
Posted by Anne on 01/13/05 at 11:05 AM
Katy I'm taking off for southern Germany and the Czech Republic (mainly Prague) tomorrow at 11am sharp. I'll be monitoring this site periodically from e-mail cafe's (some things you just shouldn't miss, even while overseas) So I can see if you answer this demand: I want coffee with you and Doug when I return. No squirming out of this one! I think we've talked about this one for a year and I mean to do it! Remember! I am 95% sure of where you two sleep! (I admit to not being entirely sure your life is not some sham coverup for something else. Likely Chief of the Irish Repeblic's Kansas City Intelligence Bureau or master of some celtic, christian, female writer's spyring or something like it. I'm on to you.) -Cro out
Posted by Cro on 01/13/05 at 01:04 PM
Well... this blog got me into the habit of switching the cell phone back and forth between ears during a call now. My husband says, "Oh so you want a tumor on each side."
I think I am going to stop using my cell phone
except for dialing 911.
Posted by Candace Pfau on 01/14/05 at 10:43 PM
I tried to use my headset instead of holding my cell phone to my head, but then the phone ended up in my lap and I didn't know if it was worse to have a brain tumor, or to be barren before the age of 30.
Posted by :: jozjozjoz :: on 01/16/05 at 01:26 AM
Sally--I've GOTTA laugh about this stuff, since this kind of stuff is what my life's been made of! I refuse to live without a sense of humor...

Tina--I'm thinking a day late and a MILLION DOLLARS short, but who's counting? ;)

Michael--I am indeed left handed, although by default. I burned the palm of my right hand as a five-year-old, when I engaged in a foolish act of disobedience regarding an extremely hot iron. It was so long before I could use my hand that I was forced to learn to print with my left hand. So I'm actually ambidextrous, which makes up for the fact that neither of my feet have ever made contact with a ball!

Anne--So that's why I can't dance! Yes, I've assumed left-earedness went with left-handedness also. But having two recessive feet gets clumsy...

Christian--Coffee! Yes, coffee it is...Did you know that our Starbucks is actually a front for the Hibernians? My father wouldn't join up with them because he said they funnelled money back to Ireland to the...oh, never mind. When do you get home? In time for your brother's wedding reception, I hope...

Candace--Well, listen to your hubby! Having an acoustic neuroma on each side is called "neuro fibromatosis type-2." It's relatively rare, but can result in being deaf in BOTH ears--which, by my calcs, is approximately twice as bad as being deaf in one!

jozjozjoz--What a way to put it in perspective!! Thanks for the chuckle!
Posted by Katy Raymond on 01/17/05 at 04:24 AM

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Personal blog of christian writer & fallible mom Katy McKenna Raymond in Kansas City, Missouri Katy is represented by Greg Johnson at WordServe Literary Read more Katy at LateBoomer.net Follow Katy on Twitter Follow Katy on Facebook 123 Recent Posts Try Becoming Brenda Starr Off Beat Scattered That’s It So I’ve Finally Signed With An Agent. Now What? The Spoon Sciatica Sweetheart A Woman’s Train of Thought Has No Caboose However much we own, we are all still living on borrowed time After all, when restaurants shrink portions, they don’t shrink prices. As with everything in life, balance is key. Slow down, you move too fast… Yeah, I know. I have issues. Search Advanced Search Syndicate Login E me at katy @ ngenius.com	It’s Downright Ear-y, Don’t You Think? Usually, when I come down with one of those rare disorders/diseases that no one's ever heard of because only one out of 100,000 people in the general population contract it, I end up feeling pretty lonely. That's the way it was with my brain tumor. Until you heard about me, chances are you'd never known anyone who'd had an acoustic neuroma, which is the name for a benign tumor on the eighth cranial nerve--the one that controls hearing and balance. Evidently, my exclusive little club has a growing membership which consists of cell phone users who've been holding their phones to their ears for at least ten years. The incidence of acoustic neuroma is four times higher among long-term cell phone users, and the tumors invariably appear on the side of their heads where the phones have been. I still feel a little left out, though. Not only was my tumor removed five years ago, before we'd had a cell phone for ten whole years, but my tumor was on the right side of my head. I'm definitely left-eared and always have been--but even moreso now that my right ear is deaf. If only, if only, I'd been able to hold off a few more years. Maybe I could have held the cell up to my right ear a couple of times before calling this man. Sigh. As usual, timing is everything. Posted by Katy on 01/12/05 at 03:17 AM Fallible Comments... Aw, shucks! Where's the justice?! ----- Posted by timsamoff on 01/12/05 at 11:45 PM Seriously. How would you feel if your very unique health problem suddenly became so commonplace that everyone and their brother could sue for gazillions of bucks? And due to some bizarre fluke of nature or technology, you couldn't be grandfathered in to the goodies? It's a travesty, I tell you... :) Posted by Katy Raymond on 01/13/05 at 12:52 AM LOL you are so funny. And what more funny is I'm laughing about a tumor related post. It sheds a whole new light on that old saying, "Oh, yeah, that was about as funny as a tumor." And that wonderful attorney who wants to help people.... I liked this line from the study: "The risk of developing a tumor [from cell phone usage] was double for those who started using a cell phone before their diagnosis." So, um.... does that mean if I get a tumor now, I can still run out and buy a cell phone and have a fifty percent chance of getting money by suing the cell phone company? Well if that's the case Katy, I'd say that developing the tumor in less than ten years and on the wrong side still gives you a great case. Seriously, though, what an ordeal. And it's likely that the cell phone does play a part in all of this. I'm glad I don't have one. (Wonder what my microwave is doing to my kids?) I can't wait for heaven when we can have all the fun without paying any of the price. I think we will ride on lions and be able to move through time and space in the blink of an eye. I think we'll be able to fly. Who knows? But it will be so far better than what we have now that all our techno-gadgets will look like silly toys and all that we can buy with money we win in lawsuits will look like dung. And in heaven there will be no illnesses, no pain, no fear, no loss. No sin to mar our relationship with Christ--we will feel his good will toward us every moment instead of slogging through life by faith. Wow. I can't wait. sally Posted by sally apokedak on 01/13/05 at 02:03 AM You know - a day late and a dollar short. You are so right - it's all in the timing. Posted by Tina on 01/13/05 at 02:27 AM And here I thought I was the only person in the world who considered himself "left-eared." I haven't confessed this anywhere until now because, quite frankly, my keepers only need one really good excuse to throw away the key and this is just odd enough to do the trick. Katy, is it possible you are also, like myself, left-footed (for punting or playing kick ball) and left handed? Posted by Michael on 01/13/05 at 08:08 AM Count me in as "left-eared" also. I guess I've always assumed that went with being left-handed. And hopelessly out-of-step and with every choreographed dance which invariably begins with the right foot. That's my excuse anyway... Posted by Anne on 01/13/05 at 11:05 AM Katy I'm taking off for southern Germany and the Czech Republic (mainly Prague) tomorrow at 11am sharp. I'll be monitoring this site periodically from e-mail cafe's (some things you just shouldn't miss, even while overseas) So I can see if you answer this demand: I want coffee with you and Doug when I return. No squirming out of this one! I think we've talked about this one for a year and I mean to do it! Remember! I am 95% sure of where you two sleep! (I admit to not being entirely sure your life is not some sham coverup for something else. Likely Chief of the Irish Repeblic's Kansas City Intelligence Bureau or master of some celtic, christian, female writer's spyring or something like it. I'm on to you.) -Cro out Posted by Cro on 01/13/05 at 01:04 PM Well... this blog got me into the habit of switching the cell phone back and forth between ears during a call now. My husband says, "Oh so you want a tumor on each side." I think I am going to stop using my cell phone except for dialing 911. Posted by Candace Pfau on 01/14/05 at 10:43 PM I tried to use my headset instead of holding my cell phone to my head, but then the phone ended up in my lap and I didn't know if it was worse to have a brain tumor, or to be barren before the age of 30. Posted by :: jozjozjoz :: on 01/16/05 at 01:26 AM Sally--I've GOTTA laugh about this stuff, since this kind of stuff is what my life's been made of! I refuse to live without a sense of humor... Tina--I'm thinking a day late and a MILLION DOLLARS short, but who's counting? ;) Michael--I am indeed left handed, although by default. I burned the palm of my right hand as a five-year-old, when I engaged in a foolish act of disobedience regarding an extremely hot iron. It was so long before I could use my hand that I was forced to learn to print with my left hand. So I'm actually ambidextrous, which makes up for the fact that neither of my feet have ever made contact with a ball! Anne--So that's why I can't dance! Yes, I've assumed left-earedness went with left-handedness also. But having two recessive feet gets clumsy... Christian--Coffee! Yes, coffee it is...Did you know that our Starbucks is actually a front for the Hibernians? My father wouldn't join up with them because he said they funnelled money back to Ireland to the...oh, never mind. When do you get home? In time for your brother's wedding reception, I hope... Candace--Well, listen to your hubby! Having an acoustic neuroma on each side is called "neuro fibromatosis type-2." It's relatively rare, but can result in being deaf in BOTH ears--which, by my calcs, is approximately twice as bad as being deaf in one! jozjozjoz--What a way to put it in perspective!! Thanks for the chuckle! Posted by Katy Raymond on 01/17/05 at 04:24 AM Page 1 of 1 pages Commenting is not available in this weblog entry. Next entry: WWJB Previous entry: Words To Die By << Back to main


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It’s Downright Ear-y, Don’t You Think?

Personal blog of christian
writer & fallible mom
Katy McKenna Raymond
in Kansas City, Missouri